First Grade Christmas Blues

Is this not the most perfect punctuation mark for this miserable moment of school failure?

“School District Apologizes After Teacher Tells First Graders Santa Isn’t Real”

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But they’re not really sorry.

Nope … because Santa was in the way of that “grit ‘n rigor” stuff.  So they called in Miss Grinch … the Christmas Crud. She did the dirty …  she offed Saint Nick.

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Told all the six-year-olds that Santa was a merry ol’ fraud. That his time was up. To get over him … and to get back to work like good little Cratchits.

But Miss Grinch was only gettin’ started.

She let loose on the elves and reindeers, too … said they weren’t real either. Same for the Tooth Fairy … and the Easter Bunny.  She even outed the leprechauns.

Now all of the first graders have to have their noggins pyscho-straightened because a 22 year old substitute turned childhood inside out … and called Santa a has-been.

Nothin’ surprises me anymore. Not when it comes to schools … and teachers.  I’ve seen it all  … and heard it all.

But these parents  … they were beside themselves. They got all over Superintendent Scrooge … and now Montville, New Jersey, has been renamed Grinchville. That’s where you send your Christmas hate-mail.

You can’t put a hit out on Santa and just expect everyone to bite their lip.

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So this substitute’s unforgettable seven and a half hour career is over.

And she’s headed back to her ol’ barista job … where she’ll cheer everyone up …

 

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by telling ’em that coffee isn’t real … and Starbucks is really a massage parlor … and that she has a degree in Gender Studies.

Denis Ian

 

*Addendum:

How’s this for more madness?

Bringing “inclusive grading” to schools … which means “trusting students to assess themselves.”

I kid you not. Now they’re gonna grade themselves. No, Really! Click here

 

*Addendum2: a reader sent this in response. You’re not gonna believe it – “Calm-Kits”

Thank Lissa Graham for this bit of shock.

Just when you thought things could not possibly get more stoopid … here comes “Calm Kits” for third graders.

Folks … they are warping the hell out of your kids!

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