Middle school fads ain’t what they used to be. 

Forget Silly Bandz, jean skirts, and Abercrombie.

Those were all run-of-the-mill fads. Rages that raged …  and then vanished very quickly. .

That was innocent stuff … but innocence ain’t so plentiful anymore.

Schools have hardened kids with grit and rigor. Ordealed them with testing mania.

School’s not so much fun anymore. All extra-serious because … well … those kids gotta be college ready … because the colleges say so.

And society’s done its part to scrub away their sinlessness … sexing up cartoons, sexualizing fashions for the teeny crowd, and pushing sexuality ever younger and younger. 

So, why wouldn’t their fad-life get less innocent … and more adulty?

We’re growin’ ‘em up real fast. Sixth graders are jaw-dropped with tales of masturbation and the virtues of anal sex.  They learn about toys that can’t be found in any toy aisle I know.

Sexuality oozes out of kid literature …  and blares through their iPhones.

A few springs back, anything transgender became the rage. Middle and high schoolers got noisy over gender-free bathrooms for some classmate who insisted they were gender-fluid … and needed a special “binary” bathroom for their ever-fluctuating sexuality.

So classmates demanded some form of sensitivity justice for their pals … or palettes … or whatever they were. And school administrations hopped right to it … legitimatizing the nuttiness. Telling secretaries they’d lost their restroom to some thirteen-year-old in combat boots with a nail in her/his nose.

And when that sort of crap happens, it only gets worse.

And goofier.

So what’s on the horizon? What’s gonna drop our jaws this year?

Last spring,  kids became gun control activists … marched right out of school … just like college brats. Exploding with kiddy-rage over the 2nd Amendment … even though they knew nothing of the 2nd Amendment.

They were told, of course, just what to do by social justice jokers posing as teachers and principals who used them … introduced them to the new fad of activism  …  and into caring for stuff they didn’t even understand. 

Which brings us to this school year’s hysterics … this year’s can’t miss middle school fad. Ready?

Socialism.

I kid you not. 

Welcome to the Age of Che. Time for fourteen-year-olds to go on the Venezuelan diet … strictly pet food. Time to borrow their neighbor’s bike … and keep it forever. Time to slap black tape over the Nike and Under Armor logos on their shorts and sneakers … to protest corporate abuse.

 And time to smoke cigars … like dead Fidel Castro.

They’ll also go after President Trump. Bash him non-stop … because he’s an evil capitalist. Expect to see kids kneeling all over the place … especially when they hear the National Anthem or the Pledge of Allegiance … or see apple pie.

They’ll get extra-credit for that sort of bravery.

Look for girls to have Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez pony tails and practice saying dumb things … and for a few really brave high school guys to get the Bernie-cut …

And it seems they’ll be a whole slew of classroom teachers at-the-ready. And since a picture is worth a thousand words … here’s a picture of their intent.

and the link … https://youtu.be/GSSWuTw2iF0. 

Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

Hide everything red, white, and blue. Be hip parents … chat up Marx at dinner … and maybe get a Bernie Sanders’ coiff yourself … and be cool … like Hillary What’s Her Name who wants to come back from the dead. Again.

The social justice farceurs are here … and they’re in front of your kid’s classroom. And they’re gonna bring along lots of new fads you never imagined.

And the hell with you.

Denis Ian